Sunday, April 18, 2004

I fell into a deep sleep. A kind of abyss where every gesture was symbolic and comprehensive. In this sleep a kind of dream awoke me from the inside and I understood then the difference between the truth of a thing and the intelligence of mere fiction.

The difference remain a barrier of language until the sea parted in a strange pattern in front of me.

I remembered the sensation and realized too that the words that came to mind were old words old expressions and new revelations.

The moment when the old me and the new me become whole again, instead of drowning in my questions I swam with new force to the answers that were hidden in the truth.

As this happened to me many things stopped happening to me and my struggle that had defined a life that moved fast ceased. In the freedom I was fearful because my definition of real lost its meaning in the idealisms that remained out of reach.

Moving toward this all now would mean letting go in a new way rather than holding on in an old one.

Outside of this dream and sleep and abyss was a land life also mine. I saw a woman that was me or a part of me and she returned the gaze.

The synchronicity between these two minds caused a flood to fill the space in between.

To be true in this moment meant to simply be one thing and move on.

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